10.29.07

An explanation of my promiscuity.
There is no promise of continuity.
I get to feel hands & teeth
& nails scratching down my body.

I'm required to give nothing back.
But after a while, energy loses tack.
My emotions nauseate the deepest
pits & bile & gall prepare to attack.

Savage raw tears begin to flow.
The hole in my heart begins to grow.
A void that splits & tears
Invoking bruises that break with every blow.

Shove your fingers into my hair
& pull the strands attached there.
The dark dyed pieces will
Fall, leaving a small spot on my head bare.

My teeth will be the next to go.
I'll reach inside to grab & throw
My loosened molars out from raw
Gums & give them to my grave to sow.

My toes will grow inside my feet.
Inverted to stumps & completely indiscreet
As walking is completely out of the
Question & must stagger down the street.

Dragging myself, scraping skin down to bone.
I'll look down to see that my own
Blood is making love to the pavement.
But the pain is numbed and I am so alone.

At last my eyes will fall out of my head.
No longer will I wait to have a soft bed
To capture & hold me & carry me
Off to soft pastures & brightness of dead.

***

Once upon a time, I was part of a slam group on campus that never really did much other than meet once a week and write a lot. I was always writing about "hippie shit" as the leader of the group would call it, and he wanted me to challenge myself by writing something dark, repulsive and showing some evidence of a rhyming scheme. This is the product.

10.19.07

My two eyes are windows to a wasteland. All is waiting until
waiting. My dirty legs fill the waste bins & leg holders of
mobile chairs. I even long for the glares. The stares. Something
to know at least they see me. My eyes are gone, pulled from my
head by the savage instincts of man with power. He stripped
me & gave me just enough to keep me alive. Worse than a
beating heart; a working brain. A power house that burns & turns
& breaks to pieces & puts itself back together again & falls apart
again, like crackers tumble from a parched & toothless mouth. A
mouth that says "There's no more left" & laughs your soot into the
nightness of death. Tonight should be the end of me, but sure as
suffering is suffering my heart will beat through the night &
another blind morning will I wake.